I’m having one of those evenings… so here comes a brain dump.
I think I need to transition to WordPress so that I can password protect some posts. Not that I want to say bad things about people, but I’m on an introspective kick lately, and sometimes those things shouldn’t be let out into the real world too far. And yet, I appear to need to write this stuff down into a space like this, so I think I need a platform that’ll support a little more granular control.
I need to fill out the reams of paperwork that go along with Monday morning’s doctor appointment. I’ve been avoiding it for two reasons: 1) I hate paper work in general, and 2) Just the idea of going to another doctor makes me feel a little ill, so I’ve been avoiding the paperwork. I’ve got to finish it tonight, though. And really, as long as this doctor doesn’t tell me I’m wasting his time it’ll be better than the last guy.

I’m spending tomorrow with a really good friend. We’ll celebrate her birthday with two meals separated by lots of hanging out. I’ve been incredibly lucky to become friends with such wonderful people over the years. It seems sappy to say that, somehow, but it’s absolutely true. I don’t understand how friendship and love happen, but I’m so very glad they do. And so tonight I look forward to tomorrow and think fondly of my other friends.

I also don’t understand why Blogger did away with spell check in its new editor. I depend on that like you wouldn’t believe. The fact that I now copy each post into Word to check my spelling is an indication of just how much I depend on it. Probably yet another reason to leave Blogger, I guess.

Seeing my family for less than 24 hours has left me feeling a little eviscerated. I miss them so much, and I’m too worn out to deal with this like a mature person. All of my mental energy has already been used up by not caring too much when my extended family came up to me over the course of the weekend, nudged me, and commented that we’re running out of cousins to marry off.

I was reminded this weekend that public displays of affection just don’t happen in Japan. A Japanese friend was floored by things that seem so normal at a wedding — the new couple dancing together, clinking glasses to ask the bride and groom to kiss… And I realized that I’ve only seen my parents kiss a handful of times. I’d never noticed this before since everything about their interactions has always been saturated by deep affection and respect for each other, but last night I mused about how deeply their cross-cultural pasts have shaped them and to some extent, I’m sure, my siblings and myself.

Tonight’s project (other than paperwork) is to rest up. To that end, I’m eating Italian peasant bread with olive oil and balsamic vinegar, drinking a glass of red wine, watching stupid TV, and probably going to bed early. There’s probably also some ice cream with homemade strawberry sauce in my near future.

And since early bed is seeming more and more imperative by the minute, I think it’s time to break out the paperwork.