I’ve been sick this week. Not horribly sick, just sick enough to put me into Accomplish The Bare Minimum mode… and keep me from eating for two days… and make me sleep for 14 hours night day and 10 hours the next. I’d class it is Moderately Miserable on a scale of “It’s Just a Cold” to “I Want My Mommy.” So, while it wasn’t so bad, it’s contributed to my sense that summer is passing me by. I was gone for two weeks that were so pleasant they felt like just a couple of days, then the day after I got back from that our family dog died and I lost a week to the haze of shock and pain that comes from losing a close furry friend, then I popped over to Iowa for my cousin’s wedding, and then I got sick (which only served to remind me that when the dog was alive, he’d come keep watch over me when I was sick). That’s a month, folks. A month of my precious, short summer is already gone. For all intents and purposes, I only have one more month of it left.<\/p>\n
I want to dig my heals in and slow time down. I want to accomplish all those big summer projects I had lined up ready to fill the ever-fictional vast stretches of unscheduled time. I want to accomplish nothing at all and spend my time reading, or dangling tantalizing strings in front of the cat, or sitting on the porch watching the trees grow, or taking long walks to nowhere in particular. Uncharacteristically, I also want to meet new people. I’ve been living on my own deserted island for long enough, but haven’t had the time or energy or know-how to change that.<\/p>\n
If that looks like about 4 summers’ worth of things to do to you, too, then I guess I’m not crazy.<\/p>\n
Meanwhile, all the extra sleeping I did this week, combined with dream-induced anxiety about an upcoming speaking gig, had me up and about by 5 o’clock this morning. I lay in bed composing draft upon draft of an email in my head, complete with emphases and bold assertions. Then I cleaned my kitchen while I decided whether or not to actually write and send that email. And finally I made tea and took it and my laptop to the porch to buckle down to the actual task itself.<\/p>\n
And you know what? I think that salvaged my day, because now I’ve been sitting here for 2 hours on the porch, sipping tea, listening to the birds, idly paging through the internet, and marveling at the lazy softness of a foggy morning. This, here right now, is what I want to do for the rest of my summer.<\/p>\n
But instead I’ll get up, eat breakfast, take a shower, and get ready for a day at work full of half-finished projects, half-begun plans, and a distinct lack of string toys or cats.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I’ve been sick this week. Not horribly sick, just sick enough to put me into Accomplish The Bare Minimum mode… and keep me from eating for two days… and make me sleep for 14 hours night day and 10 hours the next. I’d class it is Moderately Miserable on a scale of “It’s Just a … Continue reading Mourning Half-Gone Summer<\/span>