There’s a smoke detector somewhere in the building that’s been chirping its need of new batteries for the last few days. I finally called the office today to report it (I can’t believe the people downstairs didn’t do this already, seeing as it sounds like it’s coming from the second floor), but I didn’t call until after the office closed for the day, so it’s still chirping. Driving me nuts.

The light in the front stairwell has been burnt out for weeks. I reported that too. I guess the people who used to report such things have all moved out. Either that or Mr. Fonts & Colors has grown more lax about checking the state of the apartments under his care.

The day after tomorrow will mark the 1-year anniversary of the day I got sick with whatever it is has kept me in varying degrees of crumminess all year. One. Year. That’s a very long time. I’ve hated this year. I’m ready for a new one. Luckily for me, a new one is on its way, but I’m putting it on notice from the get-go: it had BETTER be better than this year has been. I’m in no mood to put up with another year of crumminess.

The weather should also start handing out a little more sunlight. Waking up in the dark, leaving work in the dark, and having the few day-light hours spread horizon to horizon with thick grey clouds is ok for a while, but I need a break.

The house is dirty. Nobody seems to be cleaning it…

I slipped and fell on the ice in the apartment parking lot today. One minute I was walking along thinking how dangerous it was to have new snow over several inches of slick ice, the next minute I was on the ground with my legs twisted and my bags scattered in the snow. Now I have a massive bruise on my right hip, a twisted shoulder, and a swollen right wrist. Oh, and a whole lot of grumpiness towards the apartment manager for not sanding or salting or even plowing very much. I told him as much when I called this evening.

I’m turning 30 next week. This is freaking me out a little. I had big plans for my 20s, and very few of those plans panned out. I don’t think I’ll be accomplishing anything else significant in the next week.

Complaining makes me want to complain more, so maybe I’ll stop. Really, stuff’s going relatively well. I know people who are dealing with really tough things. I’m not, actually. I’d do well to remember that. I should also remember, while I diss this past year, that while it dealt out some crumminess, it also gave me time to learn a lot about myself. I’ve become a lot more comfortable with the person I’ve grown into these past few years, so that’s a plus.

And with that, I think I’ll go see if P wants to call it a night.

‘Tis the season for looking back, summing up, and then looking forward. 2008 is nearly gone; 2009 waits in the wings.

I can’t say I’m going to miss 2008. I had such grand plans for it, none of which panned out. The research I was going to do, the people I was going to get to know, the language I was going to learn, the dancing I was going to do, the fun I was going to have… it all got swallowed up in day after day of nothingness and fatigue. It’s almost as if 2008 never happened.

2009 looks like it’s positioning itself to be a weird one, too, though hopefully not for the same reasons. There’s so much potential waiting there in the wings, potential for great times, fulfilling studies, and joyous events. But, though I’m not given to pessimism, it looks like there’s distinct potential for heartache hiding in there as well. Here’s hoping that last bit of lurking potential never gets up the gumption to manifest itself.

Maybe it’s just me, but every time we create a new czar, I giggle. The first czar I remember giggling about was the Drug Czar. Then it seemed like every time there was a big, messy, un-accomplish-able job, we named new czars. Terrorism Czar, War Czar, Cybersecurity Czar… And now there’s a Car Czar being born who will be tasked with the impossible mission of fixing the auto industry? Really? I laugh.

Not only is it funny that we name positions for imperial rulers even though they have no actual empire to rule and even though we are, as a general rule, anti-empire (in theory, at least), but even next to all the other czars we’ve named, Car Czar sounds pretty ridiculous. And not only that, but at this point if somebody offered me a job with the word “czar” in the title, I’d run screaming because while it seems to mean “person with a lot of clout,” it actually means “person charged with accomplishing the impossible.” In fact, simply the fact that they’ve called for a Car Czar seems to imply that there’s no help for the auto industry after all.

But please, by all means, name a Car Czar. Pay this person handsomely to rule this metaphorical empire with an iron fist. (But whatever you do, don’t reveal that the job is hopeless and that it brings with it risk of being drawn and quartered by the media, society, and the world at large.) While we’re at it, let’s name an Environment Czar, and Anti-Poverty Czar, a World Peace Czar, a Time And Space Manipulation Czar, and a New CD Plastic Wrap Removal Czar. Oh, and I could use one to manage my life, too, if it’s not too much trouble.

I’ve had an incredibly productive day today, probably the most productive day in weeks. Of course, some of that feeling is due more to the fact that a bunch of projects were timed to be done today. Finishing things always feels more productive than slogging away at never-ending projects, and empty email inboxes are far most satisfying than I could have believed.

Winter weather is wonderful when frost tinges the air and decorates the trees, but when the temperature hovers just above the point of being actually and uncomfortably cold. At this point in winter I do not yet resent my coat and the fact that it is only the outer layer of many, many buffers between me and the elements. At this point in winter I can still decide to go coatless for short stretches without risking my health, and the weather forecasters have not yet gotten into the habit of telling us how many minutes exposed skin will last before becoming frostbitten. At this point, winter does not yet hurt.

I’ve discovered that I hate having random people offer me their opinions about what I might have after hearing only one or two symptoms. This must be the kind of fruitless and somewhat crushing frustration that pregnant women feel when the whole world feels it has free license to pat their bellies. I hadn’t really experienced this frustration until last week when, in a couple of separate conversations, very well-meaning people offered their diagnoses. But since I can’t change the world, I suppose I’ll work on being less frustrated. These people really did mean well. They just weren’t aware of the over-long list of other symptoms that I just had to compile in preparation for my next doctor’s appointment. This isn’t their fault. I’m just not in the habit of listing everything down to my thinning hair when people ask what’s wrong.

The cat is going to hate the holidays and the dog that these holidays will bring into his well-ordered life. Unfortunately for the cat, I fully intend to be amused by the goings-on. It’s time he learned that he cannot, in fact, bend the entire world to his will.

I just sent a check to the electric company for $8.21. I have never, ever seen an electric bill that low. Not even close. I had to look at the “amount due” box several times, and then the breakdown of kilowatt hours, and then back at the amount due before I believed it. Maybe I misunderstood the price hike they were talking about? Or maybe all the not-cooking I’ve been doing made that much difference?

Twizzlers used to be a guilty pleasure of mine, so I bought some yesterday as a reward for going shopping after work. As it turns out, I no longer like them very much. However, I learned that I absolutely love ham and cheese on rosemary sourdough bread.